“Words, once they are printed, have a life of their own.”
-Carol Burnett
“You have to go through the falling down in order to learn to walk. It helps to know that you can survive it. That’s an education in itself.”
-Carol Burnett
“When you have a dream, you’ve got to grab it and never let go.”
-Carol Burnett
“Because nobody goes though life without a scar.”
-Carol Burnett
“Everybody I know who is funny, it’s in them. You can teach timing, or some people are able to tell a joke, though I don’t like to tell jokes. But I think you have to be born with a sense of humor and a sense of timing.”
-Carol Burnett
“It’s also selfish because it makes you feel good when you help others. I’ve been helped by acts of kindness from strangers. That’s why we’re here, after all, to help others.”
-Carol Burnett
“When things are a disappointment, try not to be so discouraged.”
-Carol Burnett
“I come from Texas, and my grandmother and mother were born in Arkansas.”
-Carol Burnett
“I’m so happy with what has happened in my life.”
-Carol Burnett
“We don’t stop going to school when we graduate.”
-Carol Burnett
“Giving birth is like taking your lower lip and forcing it over your head.”
-Carol Burnett
“We all get where we’re going by circuitous journeys, and some of the setbacks are warranted.”
-Carol Burnett
“Because nobody goes through life without a scar.”
-Carol Burnett
“I love the writing. I love the idea of typing and seeing it on the computer and printing it out myself and, you know, moving sentences around. I like that.”
-Carol Burnett
“I have always grown from my problems and challenges, from the things that don’t work out, that’s when I’ve really learned.”
-Carol Burnett
“I liked myself better when I wasn’t me.”
-Carol Burnett
“I never regretted turning down anything, I never regretted losing a job because I always felt something else was out there.”
-Carol Burnett
“Cavort, dear, just cavort”
-Carol Burnett
“I wanted to be on Broadway, but in musical comedy.”
-Carol Burnett
“When I was little I would always stand in front of a mirror and cross my eyes. Then my mother would come in and say, “Stop that, nothing will ever come of it!”
-Carol Burnett
“I think the reason I was successful is that I was never cynical.”
-Carol Burnett
“My grandmother and I would go see movies, and we’d come back to the apartment – we had a one-room apartment in Hollywood – and I would kind of lock myself in this little dressing room area with a cracked mirror on the door and act out what I had just seen.”
-Carol Burnett
“I don’t have false teeth. Do you think I’d buy teeth like these?”
-Carol Burnett
“I eat very well, and I do Pilates.”
-Carol Burnett
“I had always been quiet and studious in school. I was the high school editor of the newspaper.”
-Carol Burnett
“I never felt cynical, and I never felt that I couldn’t do what I wanted to do.”
-Carol Burnett
“I didn’t really get comfortable until I got to UCLA, and I had to take an acting course because I was studying theater arts.”
-Carol Burnett
“I was very entertained by Betty Grable and Judy Garland.”
-Carol Burnett
“It’s not a bad thing to be able to do many things onstage. If you’re an entertainer, you should be able to entertain. I’m proud to say that I’m not a one-trick pony.”
-Carol Burnett
“When I was starting out in this business, that was the norm. You did it all. You looked around, and entertainers could dance, sing, play the piano, act, make you laugh.”
-Carol Burnett
“I have an iPhone, and I can text, and I can use the phone, and I can even take pictures with it.”
-Carol Burnett
“I love to write. I have always loved writing. That was my first love.”
-Carol Burnett
“When I went to New York to try and make it, I never thought it wouldn’t happen.”
-Carol Burnett
“You have to really want it, and don’t take it personally if you don’t get a job. Because sometimes you’re not the type. And sometimes it’s somebody else’s turn.”
-Carol Burnett
“Edgy is fine – I’m not a prude by any stretch of the imagination – but what’s wrong with a good ol’ belly laugh? I miss that.”
-Carol Burnett
“It’s almost impossible to be funnier than the people in Washington.”
-Carol Burnett
“But I didn’t ask to have somebody nose around in my private life. I didn’t even ask to be famous. All I asked was to be able to earn a living making people laugh.”
-Carol Burnett
“Adolescence is just one big walking pimple.”
-Carol Burnett
“I don’t watch sitcoms. I really don’t. My problem with them is they take so long to film them that there’s no spontaneity. I want to see that.”
-Carol Burnett
“I’ve always been optimistic. And I have a feeling that it happened because of going to all those movies with my grandmother in the ’40s because there was no cynicism.”
-Carol Burnett
“I love ‘Modern Family.’ And I love ‘Glee’ – the singing, the music – Jane Lynch just kills me.”
-Carol Burnett
“I’m like your mother, your sister, whatever.”
-Carol Burnett
“My preference is for people who can do sketch comedy or situational comedy, where it’s not a joke, but it’s telling a story.”
-Carol Burnett
“I love audiences.”
-Carol Burnett