- “Code never lies, comments sometimes do.”
- “Programming is not about what you know, but what you can figure out.”
- “Programming is like art – one mistake and you’re stuck with it.”
- “Code is like humor. When you have to explain it, it’s bad.”
- “Debugging is like being a detective in a crime movie where you are also the murderer.”
- “Good code is its own best documentation.”
- “Code should be written to be read by humans and incidentally executed by machines.”
- “A programmer’s code is never finished, only abandoned.”
- “There are 10 types of people in the world: those who understand binary, and those who don’t.”
- “If at first, you don’t succeed, call it version 1.0.”
- “If debugging is the process of removing bugs, then programming must be the process of putting them in.”
- “Real programmers don’t document. If it was hard to write, it should be hard to understand.”
- “Code is poetry written in a language that computers can understand.”
- “Programmers are tools for converting caffeine into code.”
- “The best code is no code at all.”
- “A computer program does what you tell it to do, not what you want it to do.”
- “Programming is a race between software engineers, who strive to produce bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the universe which strives to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the universe is winning.”
- “Any sufficiently advanced bug is indistinguishable from a feature.”
- “The difference between a programmer and a user is that the programmer knows what he doesn’t know.”
- “Programming is the art of telling a computer what to do. Art is the programming of the human mind.”
- “Computers are like Old Testament gods; lots of rules and no mercy.”
- “When in doubt, use brute force.”
- “Programming is like sex: one mistake and you’re providing support for a lifetime.”
- “The best code is the code you didn’t write.”
- “Real programmers don’t eat quiche. They eat hexadecimal.”
- “Good code is like a good joke – it needs no explanation.”
- “There’s no such thing as a stupid question, but there sure are a lot of inquisitive idiots.”
- “If the code and the comments disagree, then both are probably wrong.”
- “The three most important things in programming are: 1. Code, 2. Code, and 3. Code.”
- “Programmers are always one step away from having a nervous breakdown.”
- “I’m not lazy, I’m just waiting for my code to compile.”
- “Programmers never die, they just go offline.”
- “Code without tests is like a car without brakes.”
- “If it’s not broken, it doesn’t have enough features yet.”
- “A clever person solves a problem. A wise person avoids it.”
- “The only way to learn a new programming language is by writing programs in it.”
- “Computers are like air conditioners – they stop working properly when you open Windows.”
- “Programming is like a game of Tetris – you make a mistake and it’s game over.”
- “The computer is your obedient servant until you make a mistake.”
- “Debugging is like being a doctor – you have to find the source of the problem before you can treat it.”
- “The best thing about a boolean is even if you are wrong, you are only off by a bit