Programmer social media status

  1. “Code never lies, comments sometimes do.”
  2. “Programming is not about what you know, but what you can figure out.”
  3. “Programming is like art – one mistake and you’re stuck with it.”
  4. “Code is like humor. When you have to explain it, it’s bad.”
  5. “Debugging is like being a detective in a crime movie where you are also the murderer.”
  6. “Good code is its own best documentation.”
  7. “Code should be written to be read by humans and incidentally executed by machines.”
  8. “A programmer’s code is never finished, only abandoned.”
  9. “There are 10 types of people in the world: those who understand binary, and those who don’t.”
  10. “If at first, you don’t succeed, call it version 1.0.”
  11. “If debugging is the process of removing bugs, then programming must be the process of putting them in.”
  12. “Real programmers don’t document. If it was hard to write, it should be hard to understand.”
  13. “Code is poetry written in a language that computers can understand.”
  14. “Programmers are tools for converting caffeine into code.”
  15. “The best code is no code at all.”
  16. “A computer program does what you tell it to do, not what you want it to do.”
  17. “Programming is a race between software engineers, who strive to produce bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the universe which strives to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the universe is winning.”
  18. “Any sufficiently advanced bug is indistinguishable from a feature.”
  19. “The difference between a programmer and a user is that the programmer knows what he doesn’t know.”
  20. “Programming is the art of telling a computer what to do. Art is the programming of the human mind.”
  21. “Computers are like Old Testament gods; lots of rules and no mercy.”
  22. “When in doubt, use brute force.”
  23. “Programming is like sex: one mistake and you’re providing support for a lifetime.”
  24. “The best code is the code you didn’t write.”
  25. “Real programmers don’t eat quiche. They eat hexadecimal.”
  26. “Good code is like a good joke – it needs no explanation.”
  27. “There’s no such thing as a stupid question, but there sure are a lot of inquisitive idiots.”
  28. “If the code and the comments disagree, then both are probably wrong.”
  29. “The three most important things in programming are: 1. Code, 2. Code, and 3. Code.”
  30. “Programmers are always one step away from having a nervous breakdown.”
  31. “I’m not lazy, I’m just waiting for my code to compile.”
  32. “Programmers never die, they just go offline.”
  33. “Code without tests is like a car without brakes.”
  34. “If it’s not broken, it doesn’t have enough features yet.”
  35. “A clever person solves a problem. A wise person avoids it.”
  36. “The only way to learn a new programming language is by writing programs in it.”
  37. “Computers are like air conditioners – they stop working properly when you open Windows.”
  38. “Programming is like a game of Tetris – you make a mistake and it’s game over.”
  39. “The computer is your obedient servant until you make a mistake.”
  40. “Debugging is like being a doctor – you have to find the source of the problem before you can treat it.”
  41. “The best thing about a boolean is even if you are wrong, you are only off by a bit

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